I left the hospital thinking I had helped my boyfriend, but what I heard on the way out made me question everything.

Scarlett had actual training.

You got lucky.

I stared at the shoes.

“Throw them away.”

Mom closed the box.

“No.”

I looked at her.

“You don’t have to wear them again. But don’t throw away something you earned because somebody taught you to feel guilty about earning it.”

So I packed them.


A few days later, Scarlett contacted me.

I almost ignored her.

Then I read her message.

I heard what Brendan did. I think there’s something you deserve to know.

We spoke once.

That was enough.

She told me Brendan had resented me long before we started dating.

Not because I’d cheated.

Not because I’d hurt Scarlett.

Because I’d beaten her.

Scarlett came from a wealthy family.

Private coaching.

Connections.

Sponsors.

I didn’t.

Brendan apparently couldn’t stand that someone outside their circle had walked onto the same stage and won.

“I was upset for about a week,” Scarlett told me. “Then I moved on.”

“Brendan didn’t?”

“No.”

She hesitated.

“I knew he and his friends sometimes messed with you. I didn’t realize how far it had gone.”

I wasn’t interested in making her feel better.

“So you knew some of it.”

“Yes.”

“Then you should have told me.”

“I should have.”

At least she didn’t argue.

Before hanging up, she sent me screenshots from an old group chat she’d once been included in.

There were jokes about me.

Plans.

Photos.

Descriptions of things I recognized immediately.

The lost bracelet.

The fake emergency.

The restaurant where I’d waited alone.

A birthday they’d deliberately convinced Brendan to ignore.

They had kept a running list.

Not ninety-six sophisticated schemes.

Just dozens of moments where making me anxious, embarrassed or confused had become entertainment.

One message from Brendan hurt more than everything else.

She’ll believe anything if she thinks I’m upset with her.

I stared at it for a long time.

Then I saved the screenshots.

Not because I wanted revenge.

Because I knew myself.

Someday I would remember a good dinner.

A vacation.

The way he sometimes held my hand.

And loneliness would try to convince me I’d exaggerated everything else.

I wanted evidence for that version of me.


Moving to Tucson didn’t magically fix me.

For months, I still missed him.

That’s difficult to explain to someone who has never loved a person who treated them badly.

You don’t miss the cruelty.